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Learning to Trust my Body During Pregnancy

Have you ever felt feelings of despair and loneliness?

If yes, I can relate.

Before getting pregnant with my daughter Nyla, I expected my pregnancy to be easy: a time of joy and excitement. But my experience wasn’t that straight-forward. Towards the end of my second trimester, doctors were concerned that my baby wasn’t growing at a healthy rate.

I saw a number of specialists, but none of them were able to recommend anything that helped.

I placed so much blame on myself and was sure there was something I was doing wrong.

I still remember sitting in my car after a doctor’s appointment and crying because I felt hopeless and afraid, struggling to trust my body during this pregnancy.

The harsh questions circulated through my mind …

What do I eat enough?

What am I getting enough rest?

What am I too stressed?

Then one evening, after a tough doctor’s appointment, I saw a mama that I followed on Instagram shout out Expectful – a wellness app made just for soon-to-be and new parents.

I downloaded it and gravitated to a meditation that was all about trusting my body during pregnancy.

I recall how deeply connected and grounded I began to feel as I breathed love and support into my body and my placenta – which doctor’s said wasn’t working well. I continued to meditate with the Expectful app for a week and envisioned sending healing energy to my body and baby.

This practice allowed me to trust that my body knew exactly what it was doing. It also felt like with each meditation the bond that my baby and I shared was becoming stronger and stronger.

At my follow up appointment a week later, I could feel a newfound confidence. After an ultrasound, I was informed that my baby was finally receiving the nutrients that she needed. She was healthy and growing!

From that moment on my pregnancy was back on track and I started to learn more about the benefits of meditation during pregnancy.

I continued to meditate daily during my pregnancy, used the app for sleep support during my postpartum recovery, and continue to use meditation as a guiding light in my journey as a mother. The meditations within Expectful have not only woven a tapestry of peace and patience along my journey but they allowed me to cultivate a deeper connection and bond with my baby as well.

When the opportunity arose to join the Expectful team as the new Head of Community, and Meditation Guide, I felt my experience had come full circle.

It is truly remarkable to be able to say that, through my new role with Expectful, I am able to provide new mamas what I received: care, comfort and nourishment through mindfulness.

Thank you for opening your hearts (and soon your ears) to me.

Anisah Amat

Head of Community

Anisah Amat is a writer and a poet. A teacher and a student. A world traveler. A meditator. A daughter and a sister. A partner and a mother. A friend. She encourages women that it is their birth right to speak up and against anything that does not or has never served their higher selves. Anisah received her MFA in creative writing and poetics at Naropa University in 2017. She resides in Denver with her partner and daughter.

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